Christmas In The Park, 2010.

Happiness doesn't come around that often for me. So I shall make the most out of it while it lasts.

I am reminded of you<3.

A new thing that can prove to me that there IS such thing as,

different. I guess in some way.
Well, honestly, since I was high and I don't exactly remember much about what happened,
You're now less on my mind.
Sorry to say that.
We should have stayed sober.
We should not have stayed in a room together.
Even though we didn't...
Wanting you physically now just somewhat overpowers me wanting you mentally.
But right now, I'll update on what's been up for the past week:
I was so sprung over this 'him'. The sweetest thing.
Where has he been all my life.
And fuck my life, why did I say yes to weed.
Although I did remember that one kiss. You know, the one that got my heart to burn up and me to get lightheaded..
I wouldn't have remembered it if you didn't mention it.

I honestly don't want that.
I don't want you to be just any of my past guys and I also don't want to be just any girl.
I genuinely like you and am very into you.
That is the reason why I want to move slow.
I don't want to fuck.
I want something with passion in it.
I have so much pride in myself that I can actually somewhat control myself when I'm around you.
A bit.
But its been awhile since I've encountered a wild thing like you. Wild, but sweet.
Passionate, filled with want and need and desire. A lot of fire but also a lot of cooling down that was needed.
I'm sprung.

Someone slap me. Tell me its okay for me to be happy for once.
Tell my its okay to fall.
Because I do not want to hold my guard up for him.
For he did not make the mistakes that the past has made.

Lucky guy, caught me when I'm down to fall for a nice guy. When I'm down to commit. When I'm down to you know, just wear my heart on my sleeve.

Infatuation has taken over my system.
Call me crazy.

Tell me a story, even if it's a lie.

Dear j.m,
im genuinely into you.
no lie.
no rebound.
=)
i adore that youre willing to move slow with me.

Random-- Irritation. I'd rather be in a mother fucking relationship and get hurt by the same person over and over again but in the same way...than be single and get hurt by different people in various different ways.
Fuck you.

Gee,

Break up with her.
Kiss me.
Get back with her.
Fuck you.

Dead love still walks on my path.
Fuck you.

Nowhere to be found.
Oh and my boyfriend criticizes how I dress, -____-.
Im sorry.
Which should I stick to, fashion or you.
Fashion offers me love.
You don't.
Which is the better bet.

"I wouldn't give two fucks if you dropped dead right in front of me right now."

Because see, you wouldn't have gave a fuck either.
Sometimes I wonder who would cry/hurt/miss me if I died.
I just wonder.
Til then, you wouldn't recognize who's your real friend or not.

Worn out,

Case of the x.
Makes things more awkward than anything.
Whatevers, I'm over it.
Anyways,
boyfriend.
Things haven't been improving. I should start being more independent and live my own schedule now since I have my own car.
I must learn how to not include you in my schedule and be fine with it.
Because we ain't attached anymore.
The feeling ain't there.
We are nothing more than fuck buddies.
That is the truth. I can't make myself believe in your lies.
The lies that we are currently having this relationship with.
No happiness is present. At least its not 100% really true.
Its just what we expect.
Its natural.
I'm 'just there'.
You're 'just there'.
What's the point of this relationship.
Its a waste of my time.
Why am I still continuing.
I'm wasting your time also.
I must focus on something else.
Possibly a 'someone' else(?)
Nah.
Not at the moment.
I'm fine how I am.
You haven't helped me at all in becoming a less.. 'empty' person.
You haven't helped me find myself.
I didn't grow up because of you.
Now that I think about it.
The college environment made me grow up.
I'm worn out, that's true.
From you. You've worn me out.
And also the previous guys I've had a 'thing' with.
You aren't the reason for my so-called 'improvement'.
You fill up my day, thanks.
But now, I'm too used to having you all the time.
I've neglected possible friendships, etc.
I must make new plans.
I must focus.
I must be healthy.
You have your own life and now the only difference is that I won't be in it anymore.
You know it yourself. You're done.
I'm done.
One of us just needs to be the first to break it to the other person.

Love is true on its own. You can't fake being in love unless there's a part of you that actually do love them. I can prove it.

We can only be good for less than 24 hrs.

Your arms are wrapped tightly around her body.
Her arms are fully around your waist.
You two are wearing the same smile.
She isn't me.
Burnt.
Lightheaded.
Nauseous.
Full of anxiety.
I wish I was a stranger to you.
Strangers are better than now.
Maybe if I was a stranger,
you'd fall back in love w/me.
After all, that's how we started.
But this time, nothing would get in the way.
Right?
No.
False.
I want to cross your path.
I want to cross your mind.
I want to cross your life.
I'm tired of this, I just want you.
Its hard to compare others when I've already had a taste of the best.

Eminem - Love The Way You Lie ft. Rihanna