White noise

"We were like strangers who knew each other very well"

Please,
if words cannot be used,
spoken.
Kiss.
Yes! A kiss, a kiss can be your question if you wonder.
Or the answer,
the answer I'm looking for.
The answer I'd love to hear,
or fear.
Either or,
kiss.

Once in a blue moon,

special will make his way to you.
Its your decision to whether accept his offer or let it slide.
Whether or not you will let him hang around or dismiss him early.
And if you let him stick around,
its also Special's choice to make...
if he wants to make the best out of that time.
If you know how to appreciate it.
And if so..
If so.
Sobeit,
And so we go on.

It all makes sense now,

“In a sense, I’m the one who ruined me: I did it myself.”

Haruki Murakami

Washed,

And all the negativity in me just disappeared.
Washed away.
Like the ocean.
Only this time,
it didn't come back.
It got lost.
In the sea.
All that matters.
All that I am left with
now
is anything but.

Iridescent,

Three, four,

Empty isn't the word
we use.
Not knowing is the line.
Because you do know,
we
you
me
who
made the choice to neglect
to know.
Burn, baby burn.
Ice it.
Completely, don't.
Don't love me like you can.
Love me like you would.
Not like anyone should.
There's no way you could love like should could.
S'too much.
Who could?
Why would.
One,
Two.

Under the water.
Dare you to burn.

Sight,

Sometimes the eye sees things more than it can actually view. There's more to things than what meets the eye. I wonder, how come? How come this, how come that? Why do you think you see that. You see good in them you see bad in them. What does that mean? What can you see. You only see what you think you see. It may be an imagination but what if it is real. What makes things real. The good and the bad. How are those real, how can you tell? The happy and the sad, what you see in their eyes. Is it really communicating something. Are they trying to send you a message? Or do you just think you see. That you can "tell".
How?

I rather be blind.

326am,

yesterday mixed with today.

comes around as a cycle.

unclear, foggy.

sunshine bright fuzz.

some minutes just go by easier than others.

Other seconds seem like hours passing on by.

tick.

.

.

tock.

ticktock.

side to side.

answer.

unravel itself.

slither.

257am,

i think.
maybe.
i kinda
sorta
almost
love...


good night,
you.

Catch,

tests,

campus,

chai, latte.

Ride your own.

Snapchats.

Crash.

Physics.

Almonds. Chile lemon and applewood.

L.

SOMA.

Brainwash cafe.

doomburger and cheesesteaks.

beer and italian soda. peach.

comedy show.

kind of.

not that much comedy.

walks, cold.

leather jackets.

paper tiger.

chai, green tea soy. warmth.

kiss.

random woman catches.

"spank each other"

boss of my heart.

sf.

random homeless high.

magic tricks, practice.

cable car.

stand.

hold. hold on. hold onto me.

thoughts, (fall, catch me).

views, cold fingers.

bay bridge.

last stop, pier.

sax.

F, castro.

L.

E&E.

Homework.

Try. not so fail.

XXYYXX.

Take off your cool.

Grapefruit,

Boba?
*scribble
Night time.
My moon.
All nighter day 1.
Random conversations,
not so random.
Night time, warm bed.
Light but strong touches.
Shared.
E.
Conversations.
Mirror, reflection, to reflect.
Parallel.
XX 6/01
Jazz.
Badu.
House.
Fiery.
Understand.
Odd.
Same page?
Questions left answered.
Eyes darker than a new moon midnight.
Peek.
Lips compliment.
Scruff.
Blindness.
Sangria.
Pyramid.
Mimosa, grapefruit.
6am.
Exclusive?
Exclusive.
Dance, groove, party,
Under wing.
Sleep, as if its only you.
And as if its only me.
Wake, opposite.
And look for you.
Silver Lining.
Crazy.
Deep.
Thoughts.
What's wrong?
Feels right.
Touch, feel, sight.
Kiss, hard, light.
Left side. shoulders, neck, lobes.
Lightly. Lower back.
Kink.
Freak.
No. Same.
Truth or lie.
Still truth.
One.





Day time
Your sun.
Panther Beach? No. Scott Creek.
No trail.
Can we make it up there?
...piece a cake.
Hidden bench, found.
Find end of the creek, fail.
No cars coming? Run.
Highway 1.
Freezing beautiful sunset.
Bike. Lombard.
Cookie. Castro.
Mission. walk, late lunches, bus.
Galleria. failed rooftop garden.
Dolores Park. high, sunkissed, hummingbird, dogs.
Philz.
Iced Milk and Hot Black.
Marina. bus, cold, like rowdy kids roaming around the slippery rocks.
Skipping rocks. Mischievous thoughts on how to get across the water to the boats.
Off the grid? Fail.
North beach. bus. Crosby Morgan, love, voice.
Books.
-end.
Long days of work.
4 hours.
Really.
Ice cream- Slocombe. Arugula. Coffee.
Print wrapping paper, typewriter, cards.
Pie. Raspberry pear. Dutch apple.
Coffee.
Cards, vacuum: I suck.
Call out, no excuse.
Macaroon. Playground dome.
Aether.
Corset, better use for shipment we'd say.
Showers.
Pastries and coffee.
Cafe Au Lait.
SHM 2/14
Dance.
Eternal Sunshine.
Spotless mind.
Thoughts.
More coffee.
Superbowl.
Better off downstairs.
Calc quiz, your luck.
Stress, forgotten.
Benedict, vegetarian.
Apollo. cry, whine, friends?
Parks, others, stares, black.
Flirt, trouble, laughter, carefree.
Lingerie.
Sex.
Eat.
Food.
You.
Lunch, brunch.
Wings.
Burger.
Truffle fries.
Cream puffs, coffee.
Bittersweet.
Our thing.
One.

Too,

also.

--And then

it starts to fall into place.

'Flect,

I see you.
In front of me.
But through those dark eyes so familiar.
Similar.
I see me.
Not physically.
Its...the mind.
I see a mind like mine.
Fascinating, dark, kept, mysterious, open.
Contradictions.
I can read your silence so clearly.
But the uncertainty will always cause me to retract.
To doubt.
This is kind of like looking into a mirror.
And seeing a reflection is normal.
But seeing your reflection talk back can be a lot for anyone to take in.
I've always wondered.
Y'know?
How it'd be like to date yourself.
I always thought.
Hey,
how can I expect anyone else to understand me when even I couldn't understand myself.
Hypocrite.
Me.
But you.
Though.
Different but somehow everything just makes sense..
In a way.
Clear but the same time confusing.
Iffy.
Unsure.
Comfortable but that comfort can get very uncomfortable.
At least for me.
Fuck.
I smile.
Relax, I tell myself that and so I try that.
Damn.
Its a nice feeling.
No. Don't.
Yes. Please.
I don't know if I know or not.
I want to stop.
But I want to keep going.
I can't lose something I don't have though.
Then why am I frightened.
Look away.
Damn emotions.
Why'd I let it get in the way.
Go away. I don't need it.
But stay for another minute, would you?
No I couldn't ask. The other one shouldn't ask.
The other one just takes what one can.
Another other.

Stop.
Just forget about it.